Friday, May 22, 2009, 5/22/2009 07:12:00 PM
21 may 2009,
something unpleasant happened today.i was somehow deceived by some friends,quite close friends,seriously,i hate being cheated and deceived.not that i take ppl's words seriously but i take all of my friends words seriously,all of them are very much important to me even than myself.i know you've tried to cheer me up after what had happened,but seriously it already had happened and it cant change anything,no matter what,i wont be happy anymore.i was angry being treated like that i felt damn hurt that i cried at a public place,after swimming,i went to the toilet and receive some messages that made me seriously break down.i was trying to concern and care about you but you treated my care and concern like what??shit!!friends??care and concern??is this what a friend is expecting to get this kind of treatment!!i dun know how many times i shed tears because of this!!maybe because this was the first time ever to get cheated by good friends!!do you know how it feels like??i learnt a lesson through this incident about trust and friends.it made me not to trust you all no more.this is what you all had forced me to believe upon.i dun know who to trust no more.do all of you know how i felt,the pain and agony and why am i the always one getting hurt by all this kinds of things!!
everybody's asking me why im like so sad,i was practically forcing myself to smile and forget about all the things that had happened.im sad,yes i am!but what can i do?i cant possibly make a big fuss over it and lose them?no,i cant.
went to red cross after school,this is the time when i didnt have to bother about other things and just be me.and i was trying to get involved with them and laugh together happily.
